Every Outcome

Well it’s gone.

Sealed in an envelope.

My screenplay, “The Space Between”, is out of my hands. It should arrive at Dave Trottier’s house on Friday, and at some point in the next month an industry professional will read my work. He will know I exist. Oh boy…

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Quite frankly I am scared of every outcome. And because I have Leslie Knope tendencies I have thought of every conceivable outcome; seriously every single one.

From the serious; this grand experiment will be just a colossal waste of money, and go nowhere. To the silly; when I meet Sebastian Stan I will forget how to say hello in Romanian. I looked it up just for him, and I’m gonna forget. (BTW it’s buna.)

My husband is my Ben Wyatt, the rational one, who brings in logic and encouragement designed to save me from myself. Which is what he did yesterday from his deployed location as I rattled off, with great speed, every outcome that had come to mind.

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Yes I was nauseous while I drove to the post office, and as I stood in line. Yes I did not actually speak to the lady behind the counter just nodded and shook my head; but I have dispensed of the question, what if?

Because in a few weeks I will no longer wonder, but know. And I will be one step closer to living my dream.

sebastian

Maybe.

Until next time,

The Texan

It’s You

I apologize in advance for the brevity of this post, but my dog and cat have a date with the vet; and yes they are super excited.

Okay maybe not.

However my time crunch is for sure a good thing because I could drone on and on about today’s subject, doubt. Doubt and I have met before and I am quite certain that many of you are familiar with it as well. Doubt is nasty little booger, arguably worse than fear. And we all know that fear, is a punk.

The other day I introduced my kids to this guy.

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Buster Keaton, a brilliant comedian, epic stuntman, and innovative independent film maker. His life was full of ups and downs. He hit bottom, but rose up, surprising many people, possibly including himself. After learning more about him, I thought hey that might make a good movie.

Then I thought the same thing I thought when I started writing “Fred and Ethel”.

That can’t be a good idea, because if it was someone else would have done it already.

sebastianhmm

Sound familiar?

Doubt is easy, quite possibly the easiest human emotion. It seems that we jump at every opportunity to sell ourselves short. Then stories don’t get written, companies don’t get formed, and ground breaking discoveries go undiscovered.

The truth is, it’s you. You are the one, who can write the stories that no one else has thought to write. Discover the things that no one else has thought to discover. And create the company/product that no one else has thought to create.

All this potential awesomeness is just waiting for the right one. You.

Go write, create, and discover. The world is waiting for you to stop doubting yourself.

Until next time,

The Texan

013

33 and 3

Today I begin my 33rd trip around the sun, my 33rd year of life. 32 was good to me, I graduated from college, went to Niagara Falls, finished 2 screenplays, reconnected with an old friend, and improved my physical fitness.

Not mention countless laughs and good times with my amazing family, who encourage and inspire me every single day.

Today I have also started writing my 3rd screenplay under the working title of “Fred and Ethel”.

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Then I thought wow, three 3s. So I looked up the meaning of the number 3. And found that the number is connected to inspiration, creativity, art, growth, talent, and being brave.

I definitely need to work that last one, but I’m inspired now more than ever to do so.

Here’s to being 33. To the future, and all the opportunities that this year will bring. To writing from the heart, to being brave, and to becoming more and more comfortable in my own skin.

Until next time,

The Texan

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On a side note, did y’all see Bucky’s cover?!

Love. It!

Good vs. Bad

First the good. I purchased a new printer so I could finally print my screenplays, and yes it is empowering to hold ones work in their hands. They’re both printed and bound per industry standards, and they look quite official. It’s pretty awesome.

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Now the bad. Just hours after I started writing/typing my third screenplay “The Rainbow”, I had a little accident. I stabbed myself in the left hand with a knife. Yes it hurt. Yes I’m okay. Thankfully it healed nicely and now 10 days later it’s nothing more than a scar. However, I did lose my grip strength and the ability to type for several days.

sadsebastian

Back to good news. I have an idea for a forth screenplay. I have spent the last several days researching vaudeville, the 1920s, and watching every episode of I Love Lucy, picking up each little tidbit so I can construct an accurate backstory. Yep I intend to tell greatest “how we met” story ever told.

The story of Fred and Ethel Mertz.

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I look forward to putting this story together, it should be really fun.

Until next time,

The Texan

P.S. Marvel posted some pictures and videos for their 10th anniversary, and there was a new Infinity War trailer during the Super Bowl. All of which included Bucky. And what can I say…

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And then they didn’t print…

Just when I thought that things were finally finished breaking, I discovered the other day that our old printer may not have bought the farm, but it’s certainly in escrow.

I’m trying not read too much into it, because this was discovered when I tried to print out my screenplays. I even had a blog post formulated in my head about how empowering it is to physically hold your screenplay in your hands. And then they didn’t print…

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I won’t lie the thought did cross my mind, ya know the “good Lord it’s a sign”, thought. Then rational me chimes in and is like, all it’s a sign of is that you in possession of the first printer ever made and, you should probably get a new one.

So that’s fun. Hooray for printer shopping!

This morning an idea for scene came to mind. A quick flash pretty much right when I woke up. I don’t think it will fit in “The Rainbow”, which is my next project that I plan to start writing here in the next couple of weeks. I have no idea who these people are, what they’re doing, or what brought them to this conversation.

It may not even become a part of anything, but the clarity of the thought warranted writing it down so, I did. Here is a scene from a screenplay I may never write.

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JAMES

                                   Would you just shut up and let me kiss you.

EVERLY

                                  What?

He shrugged his shoulders, and smiled while shaking his head.

JAMES

                                 Am I wrong?

She looked at him, then off to the side. She looked back, tears starting to form in her eyes.

JAMES

                              Everly look, I know that this kinda out of

                              right field but I —

She walked up to him, reached up and touched the side of his face with her hand.

EVERLY

                             Shut up.

They smile at each other, and share a kiss that is somewhat awkward at first but becomes more natural. They pull back and touch foreheads.

EVERLY

                           And it’s out of left field weirdo.

JAMES

                          You know how I feel about left field.

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In other news, it’s less than 100 days until Infinity War comes out!! Can. Not. Wait!

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Until next time,

The Texan

The Rainbow

Well it’s still winter and the hubs is deployed, all is not super awesome, but all is good, and I suppose that’ll have to do for now. I just need less snow and things to stop breaking/going wrong. Along side the regulars, frozen car and endless snow, are the new comers, leaky toilet, water damaged base board, and broken garage door. Ya know what they say when it rains, it pours, and these last 3 weeks have us like…

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The weather forecast today said 30% chance of snow, which is pretty low right? Yeah, it snowed all morning and we got like 4 inches. It stopped snowing for a moment, the sun came out, and then it started snowing again. What is that? Why is that? I mean I just…

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Anyway.

Today I thought I would share a short conservation, it’s not really a scene yet, from my new story idea that I will start working on soon. It will be written under the working title of “The Rainbow”. The screenplay will focus on a married couple Andrew and Rachel (Barnes) Prescott. After a false alarm they warm up to the idea of having baby, sadly, however their road to parenthood is paved with miscarriages. The story will follow them through the ups and downs, the effect it has on their relationship, and finish with the joyous arrival of their rainbow baby. This is a term used to embody happiness after sadness, and the rainbow after the storm.

I don’t know yet where this scene will take place, probably have her on the couch or something like that, and I have no idea what happens before or after. This conservation just came to mind one day, and I wrote it down. Just a little advice, always, always, always, write down what comes to mind, or else you’ll lose it.

With out further delay…

(The spacing did some weird things after it was published, that I couldn’t really fix, sorry about that.)

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INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

RACHEL

                                             I’m just…

She pauses for a moment.

RACHEL

                                           …broken.

Andrew shakes his head, gets down on his knee, and takes her hand. Rachel looks at him, tears in her eyes.

ANDREW

                                        Babe you’re not broken. You’re just —

He thinks for a moment. He looks as though nothing is coming to mind.

ANDREW

                                      Um. I’m not sure what you are. But you’re not broken.

Rachel smiles and laughs. Andrew smiles and shakes his head.

ANDREW

                                   I’m sorry I couldn’t think of anything.

RACHEL

                                 You said just what I needed to hear.

They look at each other for a moment. Rachel smiles.

RACHEL

                                 I love you.

Andrew kisses her hand.

ANDREW

                               I love you. And Rach you’re not a failure. You’re not broken. We’ll get                                 there. Maybe the key is to stop trying so hard and, just let it happen                                 when it happens.

He thinks for a moment.

ANDREW

                              I just. I don’t want to be so focused on having a baby that we lose us in                                the process. Let’s stay us for the baby. Because he or she will find us.

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Stay warm and safe friends, it seems that winter is being a punk everywhere.

Until next time,

The Texan

 

 

Writing Woes

Writing is difficult because it is never easy to create something from nothing, all while having only one tool at your disposal to do that with; your brain. However, once you finish a screenplay/novel/short story, you have to figure out what is the best way to get your work to the masses.

Which does indeed open up a whole new bucket of madness and frustration.  I am realizing that writing the darn screenplays will be the easiest part of this whole endeavor. Because while writing produces seeds of doubt, preparing a marketing plan opens up way more. Allow me to walk you through some my own thought processes in just the last couple of hours.

The journey began by reading selling strategy advice in The Screenwriters Bible by David Trottier. I will summarize.

Be persistent, but not pushy; be original but familiar. You need an epic hook, sell your story with awesomeness, be exciting, be captivating, showcase your work on a stage made of gold and dreams. Have your ducks (not regular ducks mind you, the best looking ducks you can find) all lined up in the perfect row, follow the rules, do your research, and don’t forget to shoot for total perfection.

Yep, I knew it everyone in Hollywood is Lord Business

***after stewing in self doubt for several minutes***

I’m not a genius okay, I’m just a writer. Your average human writer. Where do they expect to find people who can do all this crap. And speaking of crap, Hollywood, you got some ‘splanin to do.

I can’t do it. Nope. Can’t handle the pressure. This is madness. What kind of sick person would put themselves through this torture on a daily basis.

**sit and ponder for a moment**

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Yep completely craz — Wait! I’ve got it, the perfect logline/hook! **write it down**

Oh and this is a nice thought, maybe could be included in a pitch or query letter! **write it down** And this too! **write, write, write, writey, write, write**

Awe look it the little ducks finding there way to the row. Isn’t just…

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So what kind of person would put themselves through this?

A writer. And that is what I am.

Until next time,

The Texan